playing stretch

as this month draws to an end, the festivals of partying has to stop too. despite motivational speeches, we still go out and have wild fun. for me the least, as people go into mugging mode, carefree as i am continues to play.

as we slacked at the chair, me looking at the moon, zhiyang commented, "we can slack here till next morning" chieh-wen, good luck for your future! hope that you'll make your mark there. =) andy and ralph mock dueled, bringing some interest to us spectators. also, the uni-cycle made people look gay, as one had to lean on a pillar for support to board it. nevertheless, after the bbq was the usual slacking at the playground in the fantastic condo dar stays in. we relived good memories as we stoned in awe, letting adrenaline set in. these bunch of guys never fail to fascinate me. =)

came college day and it was a event which brought back memories. last year, it would have been me in blazer ushering people in but not sitting in the audience enjoying the event. sadly, i wasn't able to receive any of the prizes too, but it doesn't matter, because the 2 pros well deserved it. after which was a long journey home with the professor himself, and a dash home only to get ready to set out again. kumar was honoured as his guests were distinguished aplenty. presents was not something he lacked, and i could tell how much his parents love him. sweet lucky child! yes dey, there's definitely more to it than words...

however, i was enlightened as i realised the oldern philosophers romanced into a place without logic. no doubt it is part of life, but i guess that's their limit. it ain't gonna stop me now, only a thrusting force to drive me forward. think people, the tanks should be filled to the brim. adios! =)

sufferings

it seemed predestined... the path unfolding as each small step is made. following up an impressive talk by an important person, it was backed with harsh yet concerned minds. the more the rebelling, it became increasingly obvious to make that swift decision now. the heart, now beaten and battered by the fluctuating of emotions people exude, seeks peace. coercing would do no good, as the innate desire battles ferociously to counteract the change. but it itself knows; contradiction and controversy. behind the mist lies not one, but multiple levels of intricate thinking. seemingly like a complex circle diagram, and it would come to naught if they are added together, therefore a particular solution must be found.

as she laid there quivering, the answer became obvious. such tenacious scenes flash, but i could do nothing. but there is always a positive side to it, and the heart yearns for it to receive punishment in place of physical torture.

illusions

as the waves swoshed up the breakwaters, the reflection of light, thanks to the explanation of science, leads us away from delusion. the floating rock, or so the eye believes, is not what we should believe. similar to tainted glasses, skeptism overwhelms me again. however, the company i got was tremendous, only if the thoughts in my compatriot's mind were pleasant. pardon me, i just hope nature was to your liking and was trying to divert the negative mindset of a hectic life. wash away the miserable emotions with the waters of the world, if not embrace it. also, i wish for your trust and thus, the comfort of presence and sharing.

and the magpies swerved in a circular motion above the heads, freedom was my immediate link. it is our choice to sit there and integrate into mother Earth, as the skies proved to be distinct and forthright. we are free to believe in anything, as it is our imagination -- our right. something that is solely ours, but doubts might pour in saying that we are being controlled. sure, people can believe in their religion, i respect them; it is the concept of freedom of belief in which is my main concern here.

my dear classmates have shared their piece with me, and i totally agree. i am free to accept that certain proclaimed "wrong mindsets" are people's choice, and how sure are we to ascertain that it is indeed right or wrong? are you then saying that we KNOW what is right or wrong? why then are you still a pathetic human being? does the majority say it IS wrong, thus it must be so? oh well, such is the rudiments of 'concepts', if that's what you're wondering why i am focusing so much on it. the idea is the allow the human race to 'understand' each other ideas and thus, concepts. if you have no idea what i'm saying, here's an example to clarify. an easy to grasp case is the one on euthanasia, where sides are normally distributed for and against the stand. as bystanders, yes, we can simply say, "go ahead, end his suffering" such language few yet impactfully disgusting. is that then the so called natural right? or advocates of the opposition would protest, "we are not the person himself, how do we know whether the person has a strong will to live on?" equally disgusting, if you ask me. people have the concepts at their fingertips as to fish twirling a ball at theirs. basics... ...

next, then, is about being unique. people are entitled to a smogasboard of perceptions, so do we classify the so called 'odd one out' (ie. different) as weird? i would comment that we are all but disillusioned. yes, there are people who are intellectually soaring, fashionably revealing or verbosely vindicating. SO? oh well, keep to the meagre viewpoints that one might freely possess as i continue to explore the wonders of the world. rock on!~ =)

i just love the way you sat there with me silently, if we were to indulge in the scenery with your soft tinted streaks against the width, that would be wonderful. =D your mind is full of wonderful thoughts which i await to pry on. heh

a year older (contd)

a string of cycles past for the past few days, followed by the flow of coin stashes. but it doesn't matter to me at the least, for satisfaction is priceless, unlike 'du lan', coming in plates of $5 and $10. lol -.-" oh well, i'm being bashed passively every single schooling day, but surprisingly not by the books. =)

monday, brandon intro-ed rave after the short jog at a relatively nice environment. taught him how to enjoy the clouds as the figment runs wild, pushing fatigue aside as it could also be a good time for sheer pondering of affairs of the world. finding the appropriate timing for avoiding distractions and interuptions, but the company with me produce inversely proportional results to the effort made. gay. so when the big guys with dada, aaad are my good friends, naturally i would follow suit. its not their fault, i just refuse to study, and i will get inversely proportional results. i just didn't have the seed due to weariness and lack of inspiration, but its time to attain it. philosophy founded science, but sadly there is no link whatsoever in my expanding knowledge. logic? yea, it's the final stretch, so long as i pace myself, the shadows will soon be overlapped.

so people talked about reflections and resolutions, and i look back at the midyears. one particular word vanished from my dictionary, as i had a holiday, but not a deserved rest. the price to pay came punctually as i looked up to the clouds yet again. that few white pieces of paper thrashed me and pwned my confidence. but i controlled the mood, still displaying a wide contentment as we took dinner yet to east coast. as i brought them to bedok jetty, the fire burnt fervently as the calmness of the sea showed reflection. the moon was cheeky, us dreamy, wind gently... the silence wasn't the killer, it was savoured with minds of varying angles of thoughts. my perfect vision is to find a company with millions of words to say but yet not moving the mouth, just that would do. fantastic... as the stress seemingly piles up, people feel it with me simply brushing it aside with a light flick, good luck to all ya guys out there! =) the sophisticated side is in stealth, but it never fails to bring me afew surprises. heh

a year older

i walked past memory lane of the telok kurau stretch and headed for zhiyang's house. we slacked, made music and crapped, arh, the good ol' days. been reminiscing the past recently, the oxymoron stands as every single moment passed is history, however only pertinent points which do leave an impact is considered. =)

what followed was a pot luck, with some barcardi and the sea. ralph, the usual entertainer of us 6 (eugene left first after dinner), provided some interesting facts which yes... i shan't comment. lol =) a good stroll for digestion and we went to meet andy at Mac. and we did our normal playground talk, near darren's old residence. darn, it feels good to be child-like; their perception bleak and assumed knowledge unknown. well, it's just when we're together then do we have the affirnity with playgrounds. heh. zhiyang and ralph walked, andy cycled, dar and glenn took the opposite side from xun and me. so it was an early celebration, probably because dinner on tues night isn't that enjoyable, and also the results weren't completely back such that our moods are dampened. =) the conversation on the bus was cool, as the usual topic on biking took centre stage. the funny bit of it is when he alighted, and the upper deck was ostensibly empty, until a guy and girl boarded and sat not too far away from me. i swear people nowadays like to indirectly disrupt my semi-conscious state of mind. oh well, now, it ain't no love story no more; comedy, or rather, it was the aircon. i had to believe it was.

*to be continued*

why are you like that?

3 days MIA and he's gone... oh man, i'll miss bala. the good ol' times we spent sitting on the 3rd floor benches bill-shutting, and he telling his life stories. darn... the new cleaners aren't that friendly and crappy as him. haiz ~ oh well... at least the mood for studying is regaining momentum, and i hope there will be no impulse. gay lah, Fmaths = BF, faggotronics! =D

happened to see muz and kamal lepaking outside east point, then go chit chat with them, reliving the mud times... minum, rokok, no mina! nolah, abstinence. but they are still as comical as ever =)

the concept on fixtation will be the highlight of this entry. read on...

*situation 1 (on bus38 11pm): group of guys sitting right at the back, conferencing over their hp with a girl.* their exact words, "how can like that one?" obviously broken english, but their train of thought should be something along the lines of "why do you behave in a way that is not pleasant in my eyes?". then, in my semi-conscious semblance, i found out that this 'great' guy has waited for the girl for 7 months faithfully, and now she doesn't give him a chance despite promising that she would. they pleaded, and his friends interceded. it seem that they were desperate of helping him to the point of coercing the girl. nevertheless, many problems posed as obstacles such as o levels or what not. finally, it sounded like she agreed and the guy heaved a huge sigh of relief after hanging up their phones. 4 guys, 2 talking, 2 contributing. conversing loudly, yes. intentionally overhearing, no. you get the idea... they disrupted my solemn state of cogitating mind, but yet gave new insight. let's say its the believed so called 'laws of conservation' (extracted from full metal alchemist).

okay, the key point is as mentioned in the first line. the variations of "how can you like that" is commonly heard in daily life. it saddens me to see that people actually expect others or things to behave the way they want to. absurd? yet this fallacy we commit. well, as we look back into the history of philosophy, this misconception is somewhat mentioned by plato, when he was elaborating on his 'theory of ideas'. in simple terms, it is what we modern age people call classification. well, as a good philosopher, i'm not saying that it is wrong to cite such a remark, but it is interesting how humans have evolved over time to become a self creature. perhaps this phenomena is only happening in our era, but its idea is tantamount to living in one's own world. i'm certain it'll be cool if people were to do your bidding or act to your liking, wouldn't it? however, each individual comes up with different expectations, and it becomes reality. heh.

this is also somewhat related to acceptability. similiar to what my chemistry teacher quotes, "three-quarters of the cohort thinks that benzene ring is electron withdrawing, but in actual fact, it is not so". how then do we obtain these facts? i'm sure you would agree that it is by common sense, logic and human reasoning. the truth that some people don't get it is because they are not as intellectually capable, or so the excuses people give. i beg to differ, because how do we know whether this hard core fact is 'the concept of truth' (ie. it is really the case) when we do not even know whether our human reasoning is correct. does that mean we all agree that 1 + 1 = 2, that means it is truly the case? okay, perhaps its not a good example. well, consider a stone falling from a particular height to the ground. if the laws of nature is defied, and it suddenly floats, will we then be all taken aback in wonder or disbelief? so philosophers are on a continual lookout for all possibilities. i have made my point that thus so far that earth has existed, the rock from that particular height will always fall to the ground. that we call the concept of the laws of nature, where a case in which the opposite has never happened. but when it does, we now call it the concept of miracles, which brings me to my next point. such an occurence could be possible in the first place, only that people didn't know (ie. ignorant). so they are stunned and because of their ego, they refuse to accept it and thus forming the concept of miracle, where they still stand up for their beliefs and retain their pride. notice that the concept of the laws of nature is created by the human. =)

stark

upon return, red spilled... be it blood, love or whatever, the crosses seem to outweigh the ticks. well, it was expected, but the worst has yet to come. time to clear the dust off the notes and start now. the script was stark naked, so the term is gonna be a menacing one. embrace it =)

well, on monday, i hooked up the scott and raced to east coast mac to meet the 3rd council. then cycling to parkway to meet the 2nd. then it was mostly pic taking, eating, cycling and crapping. the nicest place to chill in the whole wide world was shared by the thrilling moment of wind which sent the adrenaline pumping. although the bikes weren't up to standard, the presence of the riders was satisfying. good shit shared. some of us then continued to venture to the next jetty, and 5 guys had a mini mud talk. what better way to spend an afternoon without donating away cold hard green notes away, enjoying what nature presents to us with good company and sweating away on a reliable bike. and with that, the hols have come to an end.

after a real long holiday of 1 month (really holiday), its time to run after the wild horses. and refreshed as the body feels, the pace picks up and off we go... =) though philosophy will constantly be on my mind, the thought processes enhances the intelligence as no worthy nor willing soul is adequate for conversation of matters of the world

action reaction

when exams are over, people feel the urge for immediate celebration for a job well done. just 24 people, sitting in one line in the hall. ALL were STUNNED! funny how the atmosphere complimented the difficulty of the paper was. even the pros were speechless... well, the good ones lost 30-40 marks, while i lost 55, and some lost 60+ and 70+... it just goes to show how murderous it was. the after effects didn't wear off as we were going home.

my midyears are screwed, report is screwed, and i went cycling only to find out how screwed my stamina and leg strength was. the stretch at changi east coast road seemed never-ending, but the fantastic view which we passed by made up for it. we stopped to watch airplanes as xuny routinely took pics of them taking off. from there, next stop was bedok jetty, and the wind was shiok. as always. =) 3 of us then went to laguna for a drink and bite, before proceeding to rayner's house to retrieve my stuff. naruto movie! talked about believing, when i haven't even unravel the mysteries of the world... it was nice though =) heheh